Thursday, March 08, 2007

Hitting Women

The Menteri Besar of Kelantan, and PAS spiritual leader, Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat made an off the cuff comment with regards to the use of force by the Police yesterday. Essentially he said that the public cannot blame the police if they are forced to resort to such measures. While his comment leaves room for ethical debate, his subtantiation for his argument however, leaves a bad taste in the mouth (to say the least).

He argued that "Islam itself permits a father to hit a child, a husband to hit a wife in certain situations. This is practiced throughout the world."

Umm... excuse me, Tok Guru, which "world" are you talking about? The medieval world of the 13th century?

There is absolutely no reason for a husband to hit a wife, or a man to hit a woman under any circumstances. There is no situation I can think of in which violence is necessary or even justified.

A relationship between a husband and wife is built on trust, mutual respect and love. This relationship cannot be strengthened through fear and violence. We are not even talking about human rights here. The simple fact is a marital relationship breaks down with a physically abusive spouse.

No man or woman is without shortcomings. In a loving marital relationship, we learn to live and work around these shortcomings to strengthen our understanding of our partners better. In matters of dispute, a gentle discussion focused on the objective of resolving the issue at hand should be carried out instead. Hitting the wife does not resolve the dispute, it merely postpones and snowballs the problem.

And even when the disagreement cannot be resolved to the total satisfaction of all parties, there should be tolerance and forgiveness in the hearts of both parties.

I hope that Tok Guru will clarify his statement to protect the interest of women, and not have his words used as by unscrupulous men to abuse their wives.

Today is International Womens' Day to celebrate and promote the interest of womenfolk young and old, irrespective of race or religion. Hitting women is a big no no.

Now, hitting on women? That's a different matter altogether ;)
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